Mon Aimé Perdu
by AnakinsFavorite
Summary: Now that Vader has found his wife, will Padme be able to accept the Sith Lord for who he has become or will their hearts be unable to forgive each other as she is forced to be by his side?
1. The Beginning

**Title:** Mon Aimé Perdu (My Lost Beloved)  
**Author:** AnakinsFavorite  
**Timeframe:** AU, Post ROTS  
**Characters:** Vader, Padmé, Luke, Leia, Palpatine, Obi-Wan, Wrenga Jixton many more...  
**Summary:** Since they were separated on Mustafar, Vader has been searching for his beloved whom he has believed alive. Now that he has found her, will she be able to accept the Sith Lord for who he has become or will their hearts be unable to forgive each other as she is forced to be by his side?  
**Disclaimer:** I in no way shape or form own any of the Star Wars characters, places, ect. Wrenga Jixton is a popular character, and he belongs to whoever it was that originally created him.

He came the day it rained.

She had been sitting at the window, thinking of him, only of him. Her forehead rested against the sill, her breath making a slight fog on the glass. For hours, she had just sat there, waiting and watching.

For what, her mind knew not, but her heart was ready.

Thus, she had not started upon seeing the ships and speeders rush towards her house. Even when the dozens of troops clamored towards the small cottage with their blasters drawn, she did not blink.

Nothing frightened her anymore.

Slowly, she put down her book and waited. By then, a loud banging on the door could be heard and the shouting of angry men. Still, she did not stir.

A loud crash reverberated through the house as the door crashed to the door and soon the sound of metal could be heard pounding across the floor she had so diligently scrubbed the day before. Orders were being shouted, and even from where she sat, she could hear the prepping of blasters ready to fire at a moments notice.

They were near.

"There she is- stun her!" a metallic voice called out. Whipping around, she saw three stormtroopers, all of them pointing their blasters at her. Not blinking, she slowly stood up and raised her hands.

Then, there was silence.

It began as a distant sound, but faintly and growing louder was the ominous 'snap-his' of a labored breath. Soft footfalls could be heard as the specter drew nearer. Darkness entered into the once beautiful room, its shadow touching everything that was once bright and beautiful. Flowers, ones that she had delightedly placed on the table, seemed to shrivel as coldness filled the air.

"Padmé," the voice rumbled.

Her brown eyes found his, accusing yet sorrowful. "Why?" she whispered, though her words were too quiet for him to hear.

Vader stands there, not daring to step any closer.

"Why?" she asks a little louder, a tear running down her thin face. Her hands, the ones she had previously prided herself on for not quivering in fear, began to tremor. "Anakin… why did you do that to us?" 

Questions.

Silence.

"Anakin, you loved me- I know you loved me," she pleaded, clasping her hands together. The way he moved her to fear and sorrow… frightened Padmé. "Our vows, the ones we exchanged by the holy man- you meant them just as much as I. How could you?"

"How could _you_?" he said quietly in reply, accusation heavy in his voice.

"I am not the one who betrayed our love," she said sadly, shaking her head. With her hand, she wiped away her tears and sniffed. "I am not the one who harmed the person I swore to always protect and love."

"My whole life is a betrayal," he said in a low voice. "I left my mother, I left the Jedi…"

"But you have the ability to return!" she cried out. "Anakin, I beg you again, please come back to the light, to me!" Very badly, she wanted- no needed- to cross the floor and throw her arms about the figure standing before her. In the back of her mind, though, she knew he was not her husband.

"I have come back," he whispered. 

Everything went black.   
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Don't worry- the chapters grow longer as the story moves along! But, for now, I shall not be posting spoilers because… well, I would be giving away a huge portion of the posting!

Coming next: Vader introduces Padmé to the crew of the Executor.


	2. Not Easily Forgiven

**Chapter 2: Not Easily Forgiven**

"Mi'Lady, are you alright?" a male voice asked.

Through her grogginess, Padmé heard the voice and began to restlessly stir from her slumber. 

"Mi'Lady, are you alright?"

Her eyes slowly opened and, when they became used to the harsh light, saw an unfamiliar face before hers. He had a tired, almost weary face that was hardened by years of fighting. Though he was probably only her age, he seemed… old.

"Where am I?" she asked through dry lips. When she licked them, her parchedness was not relieved. After blinking a few times, Padmé took in her surroundings. 

White.

It appeared to be a healer's ward of some sort. Everything was white- the ceiling, the floor, the walls, even the bed she laid on. Diagrams and cabinets filled with utensils surrounded her.

"You are on the Executor," the man informed her as he brought a comlink out of his pocket. "My Lord? She has awoken."

There was silence on the other end but, for reasons she could not explain, Padmé suddenly felt very afraid.

And lonely.

Static emitted from the comlink. "Very well, Commander. See to it that she is properly taken care of and then bring her to me."

Though dazed, Padmé recognized that voice.

Vader.

Her husband. 

Instantly, she began to quiver in fear and, suddenly, the young man before her did not seem so kind. "What are you going to do with me?" she asked fearfully, her shaking hands clutching onto her white blanket.

The man ignored her but instead handed her some clothes. It was a one piece outfit that consisted of a white tunic with a hood. Bowing, he left her.   
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Twenty minutes later, Padmé slowly made her way down the long corridor of the star destroyer, holding onto the commander with shaking hands. They walked slowly, but apparently not slowly enough, for they soon reached the bridge.

Standing at the other end with his back to her as he looked out the viewport at the galaxy that was his to conquer was Vader. His hands were behind his back as he gazed out at the stars which he had once claimed he wished to visit.

Sadly, Padmé realized that he was fulfilling his childhood dream, but in a horrific manner that her little Annie would never have fathomed.

As they made their way onto the bridge, all of the men working below stopped what they were doing and stared up at the woman clad in white as she passed by. Their mouths hung open as she made her way over to where Vader stood.

Padmé realized that he knew she was there but was intent on beginning the confrontation his way. Silently, she stood behind him as the Commander walked off.

Slowly, Vader turned around and gazed at her from behind his mask.

Her eyes rested on the floor and her hands were clasped before her. Her hair, now done up shone beneath the hood that she wore. The white outfit only enhanced her beauty and innocence as she stood there, its purity a stark contrast to the darkness that was Vader.

In a simple gesture, he reached out and brushed her cheek with his gloved fingers.

She turned her head away. "Do not touch me," she whispered, her brown eyes looking up at him in a haunted way that made Vader take a step back.

Padmé knew that, within that dark helm, Vader was shocked by her behavior. His breathing had become irregular, and his fists, which were at his side, clenched and unclenched.

Slowly, his rasping went back to its steady pattern as he raised his head. Off in the corner, the admiral and other men of high importance patiently waited, but when they saw him look at them, they all cowered in fear.

"I have someone I would like for everyone to meet," Vader rumbled. This time, he reached up and brushed her face without hesitation, ignoring her when she backed away. In an ungentle action, he grabbed her arm and pulled her against him. "This is my wife, Lady Vader."   
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**Coming Next: Padmé reacts to her new status in life.**


	3. A Man Changed Into a Sith

**Chapter 3: A Man Changed Into a Sith**

"Darth Vader?" Padmé asked coolly as she pulled away from him. "Is that what you're calling yourself now?"

Vader said nothing but rigidly stood there regarding her from behind the dark lenses that hid his eyes from her.

"When I was last with you, you called yourself Anakin Skywalker, my husband," she said quietly, aware of the fact that the mentioning of his former name was going to upset him.

The bridge went dead silent. Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at the Sith Lord and the brave woman who dared to stand up to him. A simultaneous gasp had rippled through the room.

"Anakin Skywalker is dead," he rumbled.

"Then Padmé Skywalker is too."

Giving him one last mournful look, Padmé turned her back on him and strode back down the bridge. Hot tears rolled down her face. She wept for Anakin, she wept for the family they could have been, and she wept for herself and her lost love. 

Then, something happened which caused her to stop just feet from the exit.

"My Lord, it is my duty to inform you that the rebels have evaded us once more," a male voice from behind her said in a crisp but nervous tone.

Looking back, she saw the admiral standing before Vader. Though he was standing still despite the threatening figure before him, his hand shook where they were clasped behind his back.

For a moment, Vader just gazed at the admiral.

"I accept all responsibility for it and I wished to apologize," the man said.

Suddenly, Vader raised his fist and held out his thumb and forefinger. Slowly and in an almost imperceptive way, he began to press them closer together. 

Instantaneously, the man's hands flew to his throat where he struggled to pull away the invisible hands which blocked all passage of air. His body began to shake and he was soon struggling to remain kneeling. The veins in his neck began to bulge, but Vader continued to unmercifully continue his torture.

_"Liar!" Anakin roared. "You betrayed me!" As lava swirled about them and Padmé's eyes filled with tears, he raised his gloved hand towards her._

Padmé felt two hands sliding across her throat. Her hands flew to her neck but she felt nothing yet she could not breathe.

Her confused eyes found Anakin's and she looked deeply into his hateful orbs.

He was doing this to her.

Desperately, Padmé struggled against the hold that refused to let go. The hands that had once caressed her in such gentleness and make her tremble had now become an instrument of death.

Anakin, why are you trying to kill me and our baby? 

As the terrible truth sunk in, Padmé tried to speak but no words emitted from her mouth. "Please Anakin… I love you…" 

Unmerciful, he crushed his fingers together without hesitation.

Quickly, everything went black.

The last time she ever saw him again, Padmé only saw Sithly eyes that didn't belong to her husband.  
"No!" she screamed, running the full length of the bridge. She furiously pulled on Vader's arm but he did not even budge. "Please, do not kill him!" she begged, tears poring down her face. On the floor, the admiral's slowed his struggle as his eyes began to roll back on his head. "Please- I beg you! Do it for the man you once were- do it for me?" 

Momentarily, he turned his head towards her.

The dead body fell lifeless at her feet.

"Apology accepted, Admiral," Vader sneered as he steppped over the body.

Gasping, Padmé released her tight hold on Vader's thick arm and slowly backed away. "No…" she murmured, almost hysterical. "No…" She shook her head as if she were trying to convince herself that what she was seeing wasn't real. Quickly, she backed away from the monster who had once been her beloved husband.

In doing so, she ran into something hard.

Startled, she whipped around to find herself looking into another unfamiliar face. Tall and rather broad, the man sported a black ponytail and a roguish face. 

"Jixton," Vader called out, causing Padmé to uncertainly look at him. "Take Lady Vader to my Chambers. We will have a much needed… talk once I've made contact with the Emperor. Captain Piett," he called out.

From among the group of captains that stood in the corner gaping at the dead body, a serious man rushed forth and quickly bowed to Vader.

"You are Admiral now. I hope you will be a more efficient Admiral than your predecessor."   
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**Spoiler for the next chapter: The Emperor's Ultimatum**

_Cold hands crept about Padmé's throat, filling her with the horrors of certain death and the painful memories of Mustafar. No mercy would be granted to her this time- no child of his grew within her and her husband, one present in Vader, was completely gone. _

Struggling yet unable to take in any air, Padmé's bulging eyes looked into Vader's. This time, as she struggled against the invisible grip, Padmé said nothing- she had nothing to apologize for or plead with- she was only left with a million regrets.

A swift death would be Vader's final gift to her.

Suddenly, something momentarily flickered in Vader's red eyes and, after a slight struggle crossed his hard face, he let go. Gasping, Padmé fell forward as she massaged her neck and took in several long draughts of air.

Vader did not know that he had failed her a second time.

"That was just a taste of what you'll experience if you fail me," he said in a deep voice.


	4. The Emperor’s Ultimatum

**Chapter 4: The Emperor's Ultimatum**

Cold hands crept about Padmé's throat, filling her with the horrors of certain death and the painful memories of Mustafar. No mercy would be granted to her this time- no child of his grew within her and her husband, one present in Vader, was completely gone.

Struggling yet unable to take in any air, Padmé's bulging eyes looked into Vader's. This time, as she struggled against the invisible grip, Padmé said nothing- she had nothing to apologize for or plead with- she was only left with a million regrets.

A swift death would be Vader's final gift to her.

Suddenly, something momentarily flickered in Vader's red eyes and, after a slight struggle crossed his hard face, he let go. Gasping, Padmé fell forward as she massaged her neck and took in several long draughts of air.

Vader did not know that he had failed her a second time.

"That was just a taste of what you'll experience if you fail me," he said in a deep voice.

Disappointment washed over her so greatly that Padmé could not say anything.

Not caring about her unsteady condition, he sneered, "The Emperor wants to see the great senator from Naboo." His eyes had a malicious glint and a most unfriendly smile curved his lips. "I suggest you don't keep him waiting."

Perhaps the Emperor would give her mercy, but Padmé was slowly learning that fate was determined to leave her feeling all alone and increasingly helpless.

_Anakin, please be with me._  
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The unfeeling darkness of the Emperor's throne room made Vader's quarters feel like a haven in comparison. Coldness licked at her and caused Padmé to shiver in dread.

Vader strode a few feet ahead of her, his squared shoulders and obedient face so different from the way Padmé felt and the emotions she showed.

This was the ultimate betrayal.

Or, so she thought.

"Yes, Lord Vader, what is it?" an inhuman voice asked impatiently. The Emperor's chair was turned away from them, but Padmé could still remember the horrific face that belonged to the man who had once been her colleague and friend.

"I found her," Anakin said quietly as Padmé came to a stop a few feet behind him.

Slowly and most forebodingly, the throne turned around and revealed darkness itself. A pair of red eyes peered at her through the shadows.

"My dear," he said in a mocking tone, "how do you like your new title? Since the last time we had met, your husband has certainly improved his station in life."

Watching a muscle twitch in Anakin's jaw, Padmé whispered, "He is not my husband." Looking away, she said a little louder, "You took my husband away from me two years ago."

A cackling sound filled the room. "Still imprudently bold, are we not?" The way he looked at Padmé made her want to flee to Vader, but upon realizing that he would be just as unsympathetic, Padmé resolved to hold her ground as a queen, mother, and senator to the very end.

Still, she had no reply.

Licking his lips, the Emperor turned his attention to Vader. "How is the search for your child progressing?''

Horrified, Padmé whipped around to face Vader. "Anakin, how could you betray your own child like that? You loved our baby as much as you did me… have you really forgotten?" she stammered brokenheartedly, tears streaming down her cheeks. So distressed, she did not care that she had addressed him wrong. Her shaking hands found his arms as she pleaded him with her large eyes.

He did not even look at her. "She has refused to divulge the whereabouts of my son."

This comment hit Padmé like a sharp knife. Backing away from him, she could only think of how he had betrayed this last trust. No words could adequately convey the horror she felt as he swiftly destroyed what little remained of her family.

"Instead of coddling her, you need to be more… persuasive," the Emperor said in a voic that made Vader seem like a small child.

"I have…" Vader started to say, referring to his actions earlier, but the Emperor cut him off. Angry, Vader stood there with pursed lips.

"No, Vader. You must give her an ultimatum- life or death. She gets to either tell you the whereabouts of your son or you kill her."

Padmé quivered in fear and could only wonder one thing- would Vader be able to go through with his Master's request?

She slowly came to the realization that there was only one thing that could save her loved ones and her own life- turning Vader back to the Light and her.

But how?

Hope filled her as she contemplated this prospect, even as the Emperor continued his discussion with Vader.

Unfortunately, in the next moment, her hopes were dashed.

"When you find it," the Emperor instructed, "bring the child to me immediately- the last thing we need is for his mother to corrupt him."

"As you wish."

A fierce anger overcame Padmé and she became determined to never let Vader find her son.

Sadly, Padmé didn't even know where her son was.  
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**Spoiler for the next chapter:** **Lord Vader's Request**

"_My love," he whispered, lightly pressing his lips against hers, "why must we be enemies?"_

_"I am not the one who wants to be enemies," she replied._

_He suddenly pulled away and regarded her. "I am not the one who ruined our marriage." _

_Contemptuously, she refused to reply to his comment at first, but she soon heard herself saying, "I was not the one who tried to kill our baby."_

_"Enough," he snarled before pulling her back against him. "I want to fix what was broken- us, Padmé. I want us to be a family again."_

_"Yes," she murmured, slipping into his embrace as he buried his face in her shoulder and kissed her hair._

_"But we need to find our son," he breathed against her._

**Author's Note: Sorry about the inconsistancy in chapter titles- I just now noticed that!**


	5. Lord Vader’s Request

**Dear readers: In my hastiness to post, I actually skipped this chapter. I will be posting in the correct order (with the real chapter 6 following). Sorry if I confused anyone.**

**Chapter 5: Lord Vader's Request**

Vader remained silent until they reached his chambers. Even as he removed his cloak and handed it out to Padmé, he continued to purse his lips as his hard face concealed his thoughts. Something about his brooding frightened Padmé and she trembled in fear as he turned his back to her.

A knocking at the door caused him to whip around and give her a hard look.

She did not move.

"Are you not going to see who's there?" he sneered, "or has years of politics rusted your knowledge of wifely duties?"

Opening her mouth to protest, Padmé instantly became quiet when he menacingly raised his fist. Her cheek still stung from that morning's impact and, without looking at the mirror, she knew that a bruise was forming where his gloved hand had hit her.

When she fled to the door, she found that the intruder was the man Vader had earlier referred to as Jixton. A cocky grin was on his face and it did not fade even when he entered into the quarters and received a fearful look from Padmé and a glower from Vader.

"Hello Uncle D!" he exclaimed brightly.

"You are interrupting," Vader said in a deadly tone.

This did not seem to intimidate Jixton- as a matter of fact, his mischievous grin grew even wider. A nervous Padmé, who had been expecting Vader to whip out his lightsaber, watched in surprise as nothing happened. "So, VD, how did you ever manage to snag this lovely lady? By the looks of it, she doesn't like you too much."

Padmé gave the newcomer a weak smile but Vader continued to give him a horrible look.

"I could have any woman I want," Vader boasted though his tone remained dark. "My pretty wife had best remember that," he whispered as he reached out and caressed one of her curls. "Jixton, leave us," he ordered brusquely. "I need some time alone with my wife."

Giving Vader a wry wink, Jixton sauntered out of the quarters.

Gulping, Padmé realized that she was now all alone with Vader. 

"Padmé," Vader purred, reaching out and cupping her face with his hands. "Padmé," he murmured as he kissed her forehead.

Though Padmé knew she shouldn't, her eyes fluttered shut as she reveled in the feeling of his lips against her forehead. Her mouth slightly opened as her pulse began to race and her hands moved towards him.

"My love," he whispered, lightly pressing his lips against hers, "why must we be enemies?" 

"I am not the one who wants to be enemies," she replied. 

He suddenly pulled away and regarded her. "I am not the one who ruined our marriage."

Contemptuously, she refused to reply to his comment at first, but she soon heard herself saying, "I was not the one who tried to kill our baby."

"Enough," he snarled before pulling her back against him. "I want to fix what was broken- us, Padmé. I want us to be a family again." 

"Yes," she murmured, slipping into his embrace as he buried his face in her shoulder and kissed her hair.

"But we need to find our son," he breathed against her.

With a force that surprised even herself, Padmé shoved him away from her, breathing heavily. "You snake!" she cried out, watching him become livid. "I will never let you take our son."

"Might I suggest that you cooperate… I would be much more willing to be merciful to our son when I do find him," Vader hissed. "The Emperor wants him, Mi'Lady," he sneered, "and I can promise you that he will turn him to the Dark Side."

"Isn't that what you want though," Padmé cried, "to ruin our family?" 

"I don't think you're cooperating," Vader snarled. 

"Even if I did know where Luke was, I wouldn't tell you!" she yelled. It too late, but Padmé then realized what a terrible mistake she had made.

"Luke?" Vader echoed, malicious glee in his voice. "I will thank the Emperor in advance for you."

"Please, don't!" Padmé begged, throwing herself at him. Her thin hands clutched at his tunic as she looked up at him with a tearstained face. "Vader… Anakin, I beg you! Please do not do that to our baby!"

His lips curved as he looked down at her, for it was almost as if he were enjoying that power.

"I am always open to negotiations," he said quietly, fixing her eyes with his. "Always…"

Swallowing, Padmé numbly nodded. "Tell me what I have to do- please, just do not harm him."

"There is something you can give me…" he whispered, bringing his head down to where his eyes peered into hers.

"Another heir."   
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	6. Lady Vader’s Début

**Chapter 6: Lady Vader's Début**

Vader knew her dress was uncomfortable and Padmé knew that he was enjoying watching her squirm. Per his orders, the dress was black and was sleeveless so as to flatter her beauty. The top part shimmered and was quite snug, but the skirt part fluffed out in a mass of feathers. In her carefully pinned hair were dozens of diamonded pins and they matched the extravagant necklace and earrings she wore. Black gloves stretched up past her elbow.

Earlier, when she had put on her japor necklace that he had given her as a child, Vader had screamed at her and, ripping it off her neck, had thrown it across the room. 

Padmé would have done anything to have been able to wear that simple token of a child's affection, but alas, the dazzling necklace was to coldly replace it.

Brusquely, he took her hand and harshly gripped it in his own so tightly that she cried out in pain. His sharp blue eyes seemed to laugh at her. "Are you ready for your introduction into society, Lady Vader?" 

Turning her head away from him, she refused to answer. Her heart was pounding wildly, and all for a good reason- to upset her, Vader had arranged a huge ball where he could formally introduce his secret wife. On the other side of the grand doors waited friend and foe, all of them waiting to stare and whisper about her.

"My lovely, why do you shun me?" he whispered, roughly grabbing her jaw and forcing her to look at him.

"I do not think shunning is the appropriate term," she said stiffly.

He surely would have hit her, but at that moment, a servant a asked, "My Lord, are you ready to enter into the ballroom?"

Nonchalantly waving his hand, Vader tightened his grip even more on her hand. "Smile and be pretty," he hissed into her ear.

The doors flung open and it was all Padmé could do to not faint right then and there. Still, Vader did not notice her uneasiness as he practically led her through the door and to the top of the stair well.

No applause rang out- all of the guests gasped as they saw the man behind Vader's mask.

And who Lady Vader was.

The Hero With No Fear and their beloved Senator from Naboo had betrayed them.

Somewhere in the crowd, the Senator from Alderaan held his two-year-old daughter close.

An evil smirk was on Vader's face as he gazed down on the people of whom he held with an iron fist.

It was Breha Organa who noticed how afraid Padmé looked and she covertly whispered her thoughts to her husband. From there, the opinion rippled through the crowd of guests.

Silently, Vader led Padmé down the numerous steps, going at his own pace though it caused a struggle for her. With a malicious look, he realized that she had intentionally slowed down and, with a sharp tug, yanked her to his side.

Suddenly filled with dread, Padmé realized where he was taking her.

To the Emperor.

A sick look was on Palpatine's face as he watched Vader drag his reluctant wife towards him.

To the crowd's horror, they watched Padmé struggle against her husband, but all knew that there was nothing that they could do to help her.

"My Lord," Vader said as soon as they were both standing before Palpatine.

"I see you are enjoying yourself," the Emperor sneered. "Lord Vader, I enjoy watching your progress with her." With a dismissive wave, he strode away, leaving Padmé trembling.

"Why don't you go join your rebel friends?" Vader said coolly, looking towards Bail Organa and raising his eyebrows. "See how they love you now? Go on," he urged when she resolutely remained by his side, "I would hate for you to miss out on one of the few human interactions you will get for a long time." 

Wondering if he was just baiting her, Padmé remained still until he lightly shoved her forward. Stumbling, tears filled her eyes as she tried to not weep in pain. Eyes, many eyes were watching her and she could literally feel them boring through her, reading the weakness that was written on her heart.

As he raised his hand in warning, she rushed over to where Bail stood, but unlike what Vader had requested, she just stood there, too humiliated to say anything.

That is, until she found a curious pair of brown eyes peering up at her.

Startled, Padmé found herself looking into eyes much like her own.

_"Padmé, you have given birth to a daughter," Obi-Wan said in a hushed tone, gently holding out the squirming baby for her to see._

Intense love washed over Padmé as she saw the beautiful little being that she had carried for the past eight months.

"Leia," the name rolled off of her tongue. "Leia Skywalker."

With a start, Padmé stood stiff.

Leia Organa.

Leia Skwalker.

"Hello Leia," she said, a smile covering her rosy lips.

The little two year old looked up at her in confusion but then slipped her little hand into Padmé's. 

Silently, the Organa's gasped and Breha's hand reflexively tightened on Bail's arm.

"You're a cute little thing," Padmé said as she sat down on the nearby couch, Leia scampering to sit on her lap.

Force, how much Leia looked like Anakin!

Gently, and almost reverently, Padmé touched the soft curls that adorned Leia's head. How hard it was for her to believe that, just two years ago, this precious little girl had been growing within her.

Before Vader took her baby from her.

"Mommy says that," Leia grinned.

This hurt Padmé more than anything and, for a moment, her smile wavered. "You have wonderful parents, Leia."

Reverently, the little girl nodded. "I love Mommy and Daddy."

By looking at her friends, Padmé could easily tell that this was true, for Bail and Breha, under the tight smiles they wore, were obviously frightened.

"Ah, Padme, how do you like the little Organa princess?" Vader said from behind them. All of the adults jumped while Leia didn't even blink. Hastily, Padmé returned the little girl back to Bail.

"Charming," she replied tightly as she stood up. "She reminds me of the child… we lost."

"Good," said he, "because she is going to be your housemate for quite some time."

Afterall, as they said, treachery was the way of the Sith.   
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	7. Shattered Families

**Chapter 7: Shattered Families**

"What?" Bail sputtered, already reaching for the blaster that was concealed within his robes. 

"I suggest you don't even try that," Vader said dryly, flicking his fingers. The blaster flew out of Bail's hand and into Vader's outstretched one.

Crying out, Breha pulled Leia into her protective arms as she trembled in fear.

"Vader! Please don't!" Padmé begged, grabbing his arm. "Please! End this sick fascination with destroying families! Just because you thought you never had one…"

"Silence!" Vader roared so loudly that the crystals on the chandelier hanging above them shook. "You have been under suspicion for quite some time," he sneered, delighting in watching Bail blanch. "Perhaps this lesson will teach you to reconsider where your loyalties lie." 

Meanwhile, little Leia had burst into tears and, when she tried to run to Bail's side for safety, she suddenly stopped as if she had run into an invisible wall. Struggling against it, she sobbed with her arms outstretched towards the also crying Breha.

"Vader, you will not get away with this," Breha said with what little boldness she could muster. Helpless, she watched as the child she'd raised as her own became enveloped by the darkness.

"Watch it, Organa," Vader snapped, "unless you wish to lose another child." His malicious blue eyes flickered to Breha's stomach where a mostly concealed curve grew.

Eyes widening in fright, Breha's hands flew to her stomach where the unborn child, the one she'd so desperately tried to conceive, innocently grew.

Padmé could see the horror that filled her friend's eyes as she was threatened to suffer yet another empty cradle. Tears streaming down her face and dripping off her chin, Padmé brokenheartedly watched Breha battle over which she would save- her baby or the little girl whom she had dearly loved as her own.

_"You!" Anakin shouted accusingly, his handsome face transforming into a mask Padmé did not recognize. His heavy glare fell on Padmé. "You brought him here!"_

From within the ship, Obi-Wan called out a desperate warning to her, but Padmé didn't hear him.

She had to save Anakin from what he'd become. 

"Palpatine was right," Anakin said in a voice that was barely above a whisper, "sometimes you are blind to the true nature of those you love."

Moments later, she fell into complete darkness, but she could still hear the war that was being raged between her fallen husband and his mentor.

"Breha!" Padmé cried out. "Let Leia go- you will regret it for the rest of your life… like… like I have," she said in a faltering voice. "I should have let Anakin go, but… I couldn't!" she sobbed.

"I can't leave my baby," Breha wept, shaking her face which was covered with her hands.

By then, they had attracted the attention of everyone present, including the Emperor. 

"I'll take care of her for you," Padmé pleaded, gently placing her shaking hands of her friend's shoulders. "As a mother, I promise you."

Something flickered in Breha's eyes and, after a few more heavy sobs, she reluctantly shook her head before scooping Leia into her arms and giving the little girl a big hug.

"You have chosen wisely," Vader said in a taunting voice, "but I hope you will take this lesson to heart, for I would hate to do further damage to your… little family."   
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	8. The Princess and the Angel

**Chapter 8: The Princess and the Angel**

After his conquests at the ball, Padmé thought he would have been in a better mood, but when they returned to his apartments, she found that he was in even a fouler mood than before. It had been unspoken, but he had made her tend to Leia, something she did most willingly, before he said, "I want to see you in my quarters at the end of this hour. Until then, tend to our daughter." Giving her a grim look, he whipped around and strode off.

Puzzled by what he'd said and more than a little worried, Padmé had remained motionless until the door had clicked shut before she remembered that she wasn't the only being that was at risk. At her side, little Leia alternately wept and yawned, rubbing her little brown eyes with her fist. Instinctively, she had clutched at the folds of Padmé's morbid dress even after Vader had left.

Vader had somehow known and once more she was being pulled into his intricate trap. 

"Hello, my little one," Padmé said quietly, kneeling down in front of the little girl.

It took Leia a moment to remember that Padmé was the kind lady who, at the ball, had told her how adorable she was, but upon doing so, her crying receeded. "You gunna hwurt me?" she whispered, her wide eyes conveying just how frightened she was.

"No, I would never do such a thing," Padmé assured her. "I'm your real mommy." Not able to look even her own child in the eye as she confided this, she slowly started to undo the buttons on the jacket Leia wore. Tears filled Padmé's eyes as she thought of how lovingly Breha must have given it to her daughter.

"My mommy is my rweal mommy," Leia protested, her face scrunching up with confusion.

"No, your mommy raised you for me because… because I was sick," Padmé said slowly, feeling that it was partway true. Sick at heart, maybe.

"But mommy always called me her little gwirl," Leia insisted.

"Your mommy knew that I would take good care of you because you're my baby," Padmé said lovingly, praying that her daughter would accept her for what she'd become. "I love you, my little one, and someday, someday, we're going to get away from here and be a happy family."

The connection she had shared with her children when she had carried them had not diminished for, after a minute of looking Padmé deeply in the eyes, Leia slowly nodded. "Why we not happy now?" she asked curiously.

"Because of that mean man in there."

It seemed that Leia was just as frightened of Lord Vader's wrath as she was, but after nervously biting her lip, Leia shrugged and smiled. "I was going to have a baby brother," she said proudly, causing Padmé to smile in spite of herself. "Do you have any babies?" she excitedly asked, her eyes dancing. It seemed that her lack of nervousness was causing her to speak more clearly.

Pain hit Padmé like a sharp knife. Her mind filled with the images with children that should have been but, due to their father's fall to the Dark Side, would never exist.

Blinking, Padmé prayed that the little girl hadn't seen the conflict within her weary orbs. "No," she said softly. "No," she repeated, gently placing her hands on Leia's shoulders. "Do you want a baby brother or sister?"

The princess nodded eagerly and Padmé feared that she might be getting her wish sooner than what the woman wanted.

The door suddenly flew open, making both Leia and her mother jump. It was Jixton, and he beamed down at them. "It seems that Uncle D has gone done it again," he sighed before returning back to his usual cheerful manner. "We have another prisoner for this cell?" 

"Unfortunately."

"Well, the Lord of this Dungeon has requested your presence in his quarters," he announced. 

"Just a moment," Padmé pleaded, silently turning around to face Leia. "You remind me of someone I once lost," she whispered cupping Leia's face. The eyes were her own, but her former husband was the one who gazed through them. A sob escaped her mouth as she was filled with a hundred wishes and hopes that would never be gotten. "I need to go for a little, but I will come back," she promised. Last time, she hadn't come back and…

"My Lady, you do not want to upset him further," Jixton interrupted. "His Lordship has got his black boxers in a bunch for some odd reason."

Slowly, standing up, Padmé kept her hand on Leia's shoulder. "Will you take care of her for me?" she whispered.

The man nodded before gesturing for her to leave. 

Giving Leia one last reassuring look, Padmé went to go meet the man who had taken the childhood that the little girl had deserved.   
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Hesitantly, Padmé slipped into Lord Vader's quarters a minute later. It was as black and morbid as she remembered, but nothing in the surroundings could even compare with it's owner. 

Sitting in a chair with legs splayed and a bored look on his arrogant face was Vader. As she stepped closer to him, his eyes narrowed and his gaze became even more cold.

"Come closer," he snapped, making a slight gesture with his hand.

Finally, she stood unmoving before him.

A cold arm snaked about her waist as he pulled her close. Before she could pull away, he had placed his other hand and head on her stomach. "I sense nothing from you, but even the greatest can be fooled by the force." 

"Even you," she challenged.

Still resting his head against her, he hissed, "Even me. Not even Master Palpatine could do so."

"Pity. You would have been ashamed to have seen what your future had in store for you."

"The only shame that I have is that of my prior weakness."

"Do you mean me?" she whispered.

"Perhaps," he replied tersely. "You are certainly less compliant that most any other woman I could find."

"Are there any other women?"

"That will depend on you," he said tersely before moving his head back to its original position and closed his eyes.

Knowing that he was deep in the Force, Padmé just stood there stiffly, her hands down at her side but, without really realizing what she was doing, she lifted her hands and slowly touched his hair. Maybe it was because, from her position, she couldn't see his face and terrible eyes, but during that brief moment, he didn't seem like Vader. It could have also been the fact that she missed the intimacy that should have been theirs to enjoy during their marriage and her first pregnancy, but for some odd reason she momentarily forgot about who he had become.

Her wistful daydreams were shattered as his eyes flickered open and he roughly pulled away from her, nearly causing Padmé to topple to the floor. Only his rough hands on her waist kept her from losing her balance.

"It has been nearly a week," he hissed into his ear, his strong gloved hand pressing against her stomach so forcefully that she nearly cried out in pain. "Have you been taking any… pills, my dear?"

"I would never sink that low," she spat, attempting to get away from him but failing to do so.

"Oh, you can sink lower," he threatened. "No, it has been long enough- why have you not conceived?" Angry, he grabbed her face and forced her to look into his.

"How can the gods smile upon such a vile action?" she whimpered. "Doing so would be a mockery to creation and all things good."

Lightning dangerously flashed in his eyes and Padmé finally broke free of his grip.

"Don't you dare lecture me about what should and should not be," he snarled. "I never deserved to be born into slavery, I was the innocent victim of the Jedi Order's lies…"

"And you beloved Master has never caused you to doubt," she snapped back, watching the fury rise in his eyes.

"I trust him more than I do you," he said in a very low voice, holding up his gloved hand, smirking as she instinctively flinched. "That is why you shall not leave your quarters unless you have my permission." With a flick of his hand, the door slid open. "If I need you, I will let you know." There was a double edged tone to his voice, one that made her blanch and become rather embarrassed all at once.

Taking this as a sign that she could leave, Padmé hesitantly walked through the doorway but she paused just outside the door. "Lord Vader," she said quietly, causing him to look suspiciously up at her from where he once more reclined in his chair, "you were right- you are not all knowing- if you were, you would have known that it takes longer than a week for a woman to conceive."


	9. All Alone

**Chapter 9: All Alone**

Feeling rather triumphant about her parting comment to Vader, Padmé nevertheless felt unending loneliness wash over her being as the door slid shut behind her. Always, Anakin had been there for her- as a slave and padawan, he'd dreamt and longed for her from a distance; as a lover and a husband, he had toiled for three long years to provide a safe galaxy for their offspring and her to live in.

It was then that she realized her protector was gone.

Not wanting to allow anyone the satisfaction of seeing her cry, Padmé blinked away her tears as she stood before the door of her new quarters.

Woeful is the day when a mother realizes that, by giving life, she has condemned her little ones to darkness! Dreams of raising her son and daughter on Naboo had come to naught- they were still a shattered family.

One that was about to become even more broken.

To never be were the basinets and flower-filled nursery- a black chamber devoid of warmth and love awaited her.

Slowly, the cultured woman that Padmé had become over the years broke down inside- before she could stop herself, tears began to roll down her thin cheeks. Resting her head against the metal wall next to the door, she wept for what should have been and what would never be. Her shoulders shook as she desperately needed to feel the comfort of Anakin's arms about her, and it only became worse as she realized that Vader would only laugh at her if she were to rush back to him.

"Mommy?" a shy little voice asked.

Gasping, Padmé quickly looked down to see a specter of an angel standing at her feet. Dressed in an oversized white shirt with a scrap of cloth clutched in her fist was Leia.

"Are you alright?" she asked, her chubby little fists grabbing a hold of Padmé's hand.

"You ought to be in bed," Padmé said slowly though she was not in the slightest upset. When the little girl scowled, she gave her a weak smile and bent down to kiss her forehead.

"Did that mean man make you cry again?" Leia asked angrily, sending a childish glare over at the door across the hall.

Not wanting to answer any more painful questions, Padmé scooped the little girl up into her arms and went inside the quarters.

Standing there and obviously confused about what to do with himself was Jixton. Due to his massive and intimidating presence, he made a rather sharp contrast to his more friendly looking companions.

"She insisted that she would not go to sleep until you returned," he grinned, plopping himself down into a nearby chair. In protest to his weight, the chair creaked. "Even if that meant staying up all night." Reclining back in the chair and propping his leg up on one knee, he studied her. "I have been demoted from intelligence to nursemaid."

"I am sorry," Padmé said hastily as she tucked Leia into bed.

The man shrugged. "I personally think it's a bad idea but he was rather insistent upon the idea…" 

"He can be rather bossy."

"Yes," Jixton said with a short laugh. "Among other things…"

"Are you any good with children?" Padmé asked over her shoulder. "With the way he keeps asking for me, I will be lucky if I get to take care of her."

Leia cried out in protest but was soothed by another kiss.

"Ah… well, let's just say my areas of expertise do not include care giving," he said wryly, actually making Padmé smile.

"Are you any good at psychiatry?" Padmé laughed, humored even more as Leia wrinkled her nose in confusion. "Because, by time I am done with him, I am going to need it."

"No," Jixton laughed, rather pleased with himself for having cheered her up, "he is the result of one of my many… attempts."

"I see. Perhaps you should refrain from it then."

Seeing that Leia was nodding off to sleep, Padmé became quiet as she just sat there brushing the little girl's soft curls with her trembling fingers. 

Her child.

Their's.

Vader's.

When at last Leia's dark eyelashes stopped fluttering against her chubby cheeks and her breathing slowed down to a even pace, Padmé looked at her companion but found that he was still looking at her with a confused look on his face.  
"What?" she asked suspiciously for, although he seemed quite friendly compared to Vader and the other's on board, Padmé never once forgot who he answered to.

"Are you really his wife?" he asked bluntly. 

Eyes looking down to the bed, she slowly nodded. "I once was."

"Once?"

"He has become different from the man I married."

"I see," he said, obviously contemplating it over. Finally, he shrugged. "I was just wondering if it was Uncle D being full of hot air again- you know, finding an innocent woman and child on the streets and claiming that he does have a life."

When she sadly bit her lip and looked away, he momentarily seemed ashamed of his hasty comment.

"Well…" he said uneasily, "I just thought that, maybe, he brought you here to make sort of a demonstration…"

Seeing that he was unsure of whether to say anymore, Padmé politely nodded for him to continue.

"We all just thought it was rather odd that, considering his all-powerfulness, that he didn't have any ladies in his life."

"Basically to inflate his ego." 

"That's him alright. Shifty and always planning."   
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


	10. Father and Daughter

**Chapter 10: Father and Daughter**

_"Anakin, I want to raise our baby back on Naboo. In the villa, there is a perfect spot- right by the gardens," Padmé sighed, her wistfulness causing her pause in brushing her long hair. "I can sit in there and feed the baby as I watch the blooming life…"_

"You are so…. so beautiful," Anakin whispered almost reverently, softly gazing at her from where he leaned up against the wall.

"You exaggerate the truth, my dear Jedi," she laughed, blushing at his heartfelt words.

"I would never do that," he replied somberly. "I would be much too frightened to tease my beautiful wife."

Pretending to be annoyed, she set the brush down on the ledge and turned to face him. "Are you implying that my pregnancy has made me… touchy?"

Though that had not been what he'd meant, Anakin hastily said, "No- of course not. I just have great respect for the great gift you've given me and I would never, ever do anything to slight that." Slowly, his arms wrapped about her waist. "You have given me something very precious and I am indebted to you."

"I can think of a way you could repay that debt," she said slyly, causing the corners of his lips to twitch. Before he could even blink, Padmé had thrown her arms about Anakin and kissed him soundly, their baby safe and content between them.

Blinking, Padmé suddenly bolted upright in her bed.

_Where am I?_

Holding her hand against her forehead, Padmé closed her eyes.

Leia was gone.

"Leia!" she called out, frantically pulling back the sheets. Still, there was no sign of her daughter. Jumping out of the bed, she ran and turned on the light but did not see the little girl.

Vader.

"Oh, gods help me," she moaned into her hands, having the wind knocked out of her at this revelation. Hot tears burned her eyes as she stood there, partially hunched over as she wept for her soon-to-be lost child.

_I have failed us, Anakin._

Before she knew what she was doing, Padmé bolted out of the room and into the empty corridor. Her bare feet making loud sounds against the metal floor, Padmé ran to the all-too-familiar door that housed a monster that bore such a similar resemblance to the man she had loved.

To her surprise, the door was partly opened. Taking a deep, steadying breath, she took light steps until she was able to look in.

What she saw nearly made her faint.

Sitting in the chair he had reigned from the day before sat Vader. Dressed in his usual black attire, Vader had not noticed her.

But that was not what frightened her.

Sitting comfortably on his lap was Leia. 

"You made Mommy cry," Leia said somberly, sizing up the larger man from where she sat on his lap. "That wasn't very nice."

"No, it wasn't," Vader agreed, a small smile playing on his lips. "I am very sorry."

"I want us to be a family," Leia sighed. "I had a family, with Momma and Poppa." Her brown eyes accusingly looked up at him. "Why did you take me?"

"I want us to be a family too," Vader said slowly. "Very much so. It wouldn't be the same if my little girl was missing."

There was a pregnant pause.

"Do you love Mommy?"

"Yes," he said quietly. "I always have." 

"Always?" she echoed.

Vader nodded, his blue eyes regarding her curiously. "I used to have dreams about her, even back before we met."

"That's weird."

"It is," he laughed. "It is, young one. You will find that many weird things happen in our family…"

"Like me?"

He pursed his lips. "No, you were a blessing to us."

"What's 'a blessing'?" Leia asked, stumbling over the rather complicated word. Her little face scrunched up as she tried to figure it out for herself.

"Something very precious," he whispered, bending over to kiss Leia on her forehead.

This delighted Leia and she beamed up at him. "Will you promise to be nicer?" she asked in a very serious tone, placing her small hand over his heart. As he blinked rapidly at her, she held his gaze in such a stern way that would have done Bail proud.

"Yes," he said softly, at first not moving but soon he began to fervently nod his head.

"And no more making Mommy cry?"

"I promise," he said, holding up his hand which she squeezed.

"And no more frat… frat…"

"Fraternizing?" Vader asked dubiously, his eyebrows rising in surprise.

The little girl nodded. "No more frat… oh, well, with bad people."

"Of course," he said, barking in laughter a few times. "Where did you ever learn such a big word like that?"

"My Poppa," she said softly, her little face momentarily showing her sadness. 

"Well, I'm sure he'd be proud of you… like I am," Anakin said slowly, gathering her into his strong embrace. "I love you, mon petit ange," he whispered.

"Anakin?" Padmé breathed before she could stop herself. Her hands limply fell to her side as she stared in amazement.

He raised his head and smiled at her.   
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	11. The Great Deceiver

**Sorry I haven't posted in a while- DRl and computer viruses are the usual suspects.**

**Chapter 11: The Great Deceiver**

Vader used the Force to slowly open the door to reveal her disbelieving person.

"Anakin?" she whispered again, her eyes welling up with tears. Her young heart, moments ago ready to break in pain, fluttered in hope upon seeing the familiar, boyish smile that she'd fallen in love with five years ago.

"Mommy!" Leia cried out. Bolting off of Vader's lap, she ran to Padmé and flung her small arms about her legs. 

Despite the butterflies that filled her stomach and the sure blush that spread across her face as he watched her with those vibrant eyes, Padmé picked up the little girl and held her close. "I… was so worried," she stammered into Leia's curly head, placing a grateful kiss there as she closed her eyes in relief. 

"I was worried about you," Leia said staunchly, jabbing a little finger into Padmé's chest. "You cried,"

At loss for words, Padmé tired to stammer something out but stopped upon seeing Leia's brown eyes gaze at her accusingly. 

"How about you go back to your room?" Vader suggested gently, deftly plucking Leia out of her mother's arms and placing her on the floor with a slight pat on the bottom. "Your mother and I need to have a little time alone," he explained upon seeing her crestfallen face.

His sudden transformation had left Padmé ill at ease- had her daughter, with her powerful innocence, actually brought him back to the Light? She hesitantly regarded Vader. "It's alright- she can stay," Padmé said.

A sly grin was sent her way, one that made her heart thump. "No- I want some time alone… with you," he whispered, his baby blue eyes boring into hers as he placed his gloved hand on her slender neck. His thumb brushed against her skin as he expectantly waited for the little girl to leave.

But, it seemed that Leia wouldn't be swayed. "I wanna stay with Mommy," she said quietly, her big eyes not blinking as she popped her thumb into her mouth, obviously haunted by memories of the family she'd been taken from. "I want to stay with Mommy," she whispered, her big brown eyes not blinking as she popped her thumb into her mouth, the ragged blanket she carried suddenly drawn close.

"I'll stay with her for you," Vader said, his fingers lightly trailing down Padmé's back as he knelt down before the two year old.

"I still wanna."

"Princes…" 

"Daddy…"

Big brown eyes stared into blue ones, and Padmé could literally feel the invisible war that was raging between the Sith and his daughter.

Then, a familiar personage stepped into the room. "Uh… oh," Jixton grimaced, immediately backing out of the door with his hands held up in front of him as he saw the seriousness of the moment. "I'm not in the mood for group hugs right now."

Vader said something dryly under his breath, but he was covert enough in doing so that Padmé could not understand what he said. "Would you please take the princess back to her quarters- and see to it that she doesn't escape… again." Vader's voice held enough of a threat that the man actually considered him seriously for a moment before breaking into a wide grin.

Still, when he looked back down at the child, Jixton had obvious confusion written on his face and seemed unsure of what to do.

"Tell her to come to you," Vader instructed rather impatiently, drumming his fingers on his bent knee before standing up to his full height.

"Come princess- we don't want to get Uncle D cranky again, especially not this early in the morning," Jixton said cheerfully, ignoring the look his employer sent him.

Leia did not move but continued to plead her reluctant mother with her eyes.

"Jixton…"

"What do you want me to do- pick her up?" the large man cried out.

A stern look was his reply.

Grumbling something about Vader and his lack of humor, Jixton effortlessly picked up the protesting Leia and carried her out of sight.

"So long, princess," Vader whispered, his blue eyes not blinking. "Enjoy your innocence while you still have it."

Once more, Padmé did not hear him, but it wasn't because he was whispering.

She was watching his hand move towards his lightsaber.   
--------------------------------------------------------------------


	12. Nevermore

**Chapter 12: Nevermore**

"Anakin, what are you doing?" Padmé whispered, her eyes widening in shock as she slowly backed away from him.

Gone was the handsome Knight who had swept her off her feet- cold eyes now regarded her unsympathetically.

"Anakin?" 

"My name is not Anakin," he spat, his sudden movement causing her to jump.

"But…" she began to protest, Padmé's heart fighting against what her mind knew to be true.

"There are no 'buts,' my love," he sneered, running a long index finger against her fragile jaw, "just as there is no longer an 'us.'"

"But you said… you told Leia you'd changed." A lone tear rolled down from her disbelieving brown eyes to gaunt cheeks. "You promised…"

"A two year old who was foolish enough to believe a Sith," he finished flatly.

"I do not know you," she whispered, shaking her head mournfully.

Anakin, why?

"I do not know you," Padmé whispered in a hollow voice.

"I could say the same about you, my dear."

"Are you calling me a liar- again?" she asked softly. Padmé quickly turned her back to him so that she would not have to see her greatest failure. 

Suddenly, she felt something cold press against the thin material of her nightgown to her back, causing her to arch away from it until a firm hand gripped her shoulder. Crying out in pain, Padmé struggled to get away even as Vader dug his gloved hand further into her skin.

"Just where do you think you're going?" he hissed into her ear, his hot breath sending chills down her spine. Not caring how much he hurt her, he pushed the hilt of his lightsaber harder against her back.

Then, she stopped struggling. "Nowhere," she whispered, her face becoming obscured by cascading curls as Padmé hung her head in defeat.

Perhaps her comment had surprised him, but Vader surprisingly said nothing.

A minute went by as she tried to even her breathing and pounding heart, taking what were sure to be her last glimpses of life. He had failed her twice before, fate eventually grant her respite.

Soon, all that could be heard was the sound of his labored breathing and the whispering of his gloved hand against the metal of his lightsaber.

Knowing what had to be done, Padmé slowly moved. Instantly, the large hand tightened its hold, and , biting back the urge to cry, she turned around to face him.

For some odd reason, he loosened his grip on her and Vader's hand fell to his side. His ignited lightsaber still pointed at her, but she noticed that it wavered.

Padmé now stood facing him and, with an effort that was beyond bearable, she lifted her brown eyes to look into Vader's one last time.

"Anakin," she whispered, placing her trembling fingertips on his chest.

The lightsaber was soon pressed against her stomach.

"Anakin," she said in an even quieter voice, ignoring the pain the weapon caused. "Please, let me taste your lips one last sweet time before… before…"

Confusion flitted into his brown eyes before a sneer parted his lips. "Gladly."

In a single movement, he crushed her against him and kissed her roughly. When Padmé struggled, he only responded by pulling her closer against him until her body ached and she was left breathless. His free hand gripped at her neck, causing her to cry out in pain.

Against his forceful movements, Padmé began to lightly kiss him, her gentle affection a sharp contract to his plundering. A growl was his first response but slowly and in an almost imperceptive way, Vader's lips began to move in tandem with hers. The hand, the one that had been squeezing her neck moments before, lightly caressed her skin. 

Suddenly, it was over.

Pulling away and gasping for air, Padmé triumphantly gazed at Vader. "Now you can kill me," she whispered, delighting in the way his eyes moved uncertainly.

He did not move.

"Is the great Dark Lord of the Sith a coward?" she taunted.

Vader said nothing but turned h8is broad back to her as he gasped for breath. Shoulders slumping, he hung his head and, though she could not see his face, Padmé knew of the conflict that was present on it.

Not wanting him to have the satisfaction of hiding from her, Padmé slowly walked around Vader and purposely placed herself just a few inches in front of him. Daringly, she lifted her face to meet his, a wide grin on her face.

"Kill me, Vader," she sneered. "Kill me like you were so willing to moments ago."

Turning his head to the side, Vader avoided her accusing glare.

"Or…" she said purpousfully, "has Palpatine not fully destroyed the side of you that you've tried oh so carefully to hide?"

Suddenly, her cheek stung and she fell to the floor, numbly staring up at the man she'd just challenged. A beam of red inched narrowly close to her throat."

"Daddy?" a childish voice from behind them asked. "What are you doing?"


	13. The Impossible Request

**Chapter 13: The Impossible Request**

Keeping the lightsaber pointed at Padmé's throat, Vader stole a look over his shoulder to see a wide-eyed Leia standing in the doorway. A discarded blanket pooled at her feet while her young heart took in the horrible truth- the first time her true father had given her reason to trust him, Vader had turned around and ruthlessly deceived her.

"Daddy, why are you hurting Mommy?"

"Leia, go," Padmé rasped, holding back a sob as the beam drew nearer to her throat. Her eyes then found Vader's. "Kill me," she whispered. "Kill me, and I shall no longer be bound to the ghost of a man that once was." 

For a moment, the saber licked against her skin, its blade dangerously warming that spot, but it then began to waver a little. 

Out of the corner of her eye, Padmé saw Leia take a tentative step towards her. "Please, my child, leave while you still can," she cried out. "Remember that mommy loves you!" 

"And I do not?" Vader sneered as he lunged out and harshly kicked Padmé in the side, causing her to gasp out in pain and clutch her thigh.

"It does not take love to create children, Chosen one," she gasped, wincing in pain. "Even the Galaxy's biggest…"

"Padmé…" he growled in warning.

"…can do that. It takes love to raise them, though."

She had gone too far.

His lightsaber suddenly pulled away from her as he whipped around to find Leia, who had been slowly walking towards Padmé previously unnoticed, kneeling down at her mother's side with her little hand on Padmé's forehead.

Before Vader had even moved, Padmé saw the deadly intent in his eyes.

In the mere second in which Vader moved away from her and raised his palm at the trembling Leia, Padmé, with what little strength remained in her, scooped the little girl into her arms and cradled her daughter against her heaving breast. 

"End it now," she begged, burying her face into Leia's short curls as the little girl began to shake and sob. "I never asked you for anything- I never had something to ask you for- grant us the mercy of death."

At this, Leia shrilly screamed and clutched at Padmé's hair, her little fingers digging into her mother's scalp.

Suddenly, she felt something warm envelop her. Crying out as her eyes flashed open, Padmé found that it was Vader and that it was his arms that encircled her frail body.

He was crying.

Soon, his face was buried against the crook of her neck as he awkwardly pulled her against him in a movement that nearly stopped her pounding heart.

"Force, help me," he moaned, his gloved hands cupping her face as he placed his trembling lips against hers. "I just cannot do it." As a sob escaped him, Vader rested his forehead against hers, his tears rolling down Padmé's face to mingle with her own. "You are my only weakness, one that I can never be rid of. The Emperor…" he shuddered, his voice catching, "he must never know." With a determined look, he stood up, leaving her still trembling and weeping on the floor.

"Why?" she whispered brokenheartedly. "Why must you do this to us?"

"Do what?" Vader asked in confusion.

"Not let us go," she whispered, shakily standing up with the precious burden still in her protective arms. "Vader, Anakin- whoever you are- think about what is best for us, for Luke, and for the baby I might conceive."

Vader feverishly shook his blond head. "You are asking for the impossible, my love. You cannot possibly understand what I suffer." 

"No, you do not understand what you do to us, and for that, you have deemed it impossible."


	14. Bad Dreams

**Chapter 14: Bad Dreams**

Without saying another word, Vader had stormed out of his quarters, the door sliding shut behind him. Even after he'd left, Padmé remained huddled on the ground holding the sobbing princess in he arms.

_Had I know that it would come to this, I would have feared the day we were to be reunited._  
"Mommy, what's happening?" Leia finally whispered into Padmé's ear, her little hands finally loosening their grip on her mother's hair.

"I… do not know," Padmé admitted, praying that her fear was not so visible on her face as it had been minutes before.

It would only be a matter of time before the Emperor himself gained knowledge of Vader's weakness, but until then, she could only wait with baited breath.

Padmé was used to waiting, but she had a feeling that time was running out.

Quickly. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Secretly, she had hoped that Vader's wishes for another heir would come to naught, but a week later as she laid in bed next to him, Padmé realized that her desire had been in vain. 

Things had been alright when she'd woken up, that is, considering the fact that the monster who called himself her husband had his arms about her and his face buried in her hair. That alone was something startling to wake up and find, but as soon as Padmé's heart rate settled back down to normal, she tried to close her eyes and fall back into a dreamless slumber.

Five minutes later, the former senator was emptying the contents of her stomach into the 'fresher. As her stomach burned and her eyes watered from the overwhelming nausea, Padmé prayed that Vader would grant her a rare moment of privacy and not burst in the small room.

Luck smiled upon her for once and she was able to continue the embarrassing act without interruption.

Long after there was nothing left to bring up, Padmé continued to remain hunched over there, her brown eyes not seeing the mess she'd created.

She was pregnant.

Not with Anakin's child, but by a heartless Sith Lord who used her for reasons that she did not want to understand.

And never hoped to.

When dizziness finally overcame her, Padmé flushed the sickness away and collapsed to the floor, her back against the cabinet as she struggled for air. Her unfocused eyes opened and closed as Padmé's mind grasped what her heart could not.

Vader had been aloof this past week- he would randomly storm in and out of his quarters just enough to keep Leia and Padmé on edge, but his schedule was so demanding that they mostly say him at night.

The night before, he had silently forced

He had silently forced her to be his bed partner, and Padmé had most unwillingly climbed into bed with him.

_Happy moments were hard to come by, and Padmé had stopped thinking of her own welfare and had done everything to keep her daughter happy. This had proven harder than she had thought, but with Vader mostly being away on some mysterious mission, there had been plenty of time for mother-daughter bonding. Though Leia never forgot her adoptive parents and talked about them quite frequently, Padmé proved to be a suitable companion and, with time, would surely take priority in her little heart._

Upon learning that the little girl loved it when she told stories, Padmé racked her brain for one to share, one that would make her daughter notice less of their unfavorable surroundings.

"Tell me a happy story," Leia urged as she climbed onto Padmé's lap and looked at her with adoring eyes.

"A happy story?" Padmé echoed, mockingly wrinkling her nose. "You ask so much of me!" Truthfully, the depressiveness of the past three years had caused her to forget most of the happy moments of her former life, but the eagerness of her daughter made Padmé vow to tell one even if she had to make it up.

"Tell me a story about how you met Daddy- my other Mommy and Daddy used to tell me it all the time." Already, Leia had established that her true father and Vader were essentially two different people, and when speaking about them, she referred to them as such. To his face, he was Vader, but when Padmé spoke of their family, the man became Anakin Skywalker, the man Leia briefly thought she had known.

"This is not going to be a happy story," Padmé protested, her throat becoming tight with emotion. Quickly looking away, she prayed that the perceptive two year old hadn't seen her tears.

"Yes it is," Leia insisted, kicking her foot against the chair in dramatic frustration. "You got me and the baby." Though her twin was not a baby in comparison, Leia continued to call her sibling such.

Hesitantly, Padmé spoke of her greatest regret. 

This was the scene Vader stumbled upon when he entered into his quarters nearly an hour later. So deep in her story telling, Padmé had not noticed his arrival and continued to speak of her former lover with such fervor that her cheeks had become a rosy pink and her brown eyes sparkled for the first time in many weeks. The tale went on and on as she spoke of her stay at the villa with Anakin and how he'd been torn between his love for the two women in his life.

But at the part when they arrived on Tatooine, Vader loudly cleared his throat, causing Padmé to jump and look at him in a terrified way. "That will be enough," he said gruffly, gesturing for Leia to leave.

Unsure of what to do, Leia looked to her frightened mother for advice, but upon seeing that she was going to receive none, slipped off Padmé's lap and walked towards Vader.

As she did this, Vader continued to unblinkingly gaze at Padmé, his cold eyes calculating and deadly.

Personally, Padmé did not want to find out what he was thinking.

In horror, she watched Leia approach Vader, but before she could stop the little girl, Padmé saw Leia slowly reach out and tug on the tall man's trousers.

His gaze flickered from his wife to down at his feet where the child stood. On Leia's face was a shy smile as she reached for his hand and kissed it. "Thank you," she whispered before taking his hand and holding it to her cheek.

Vader was at loss for words. 

Seeing as he did not move, Leia continued to stand there with his hand cupping her face.

"You need to go to bed," he said in a constricted voice before harshly snatching away his hand so forcefully that the little princess nearly toppled over.

She bit her lip so as to not cry, but Leia nodded and practically ran out of the room, nearly tripping over the blanket she carried in the process.

Padmé's eyes filled with tears as she gazed at the monster. That was what could have been her heart seemed to brokenly whisper to him. You took it from us.

Though he could not read her mind, Padmé's eyes told Vader plenty and he silently went about removing his cloak. He entered into and soon came out of the 'fresher dressed in nothing but his traditional black sleep pants.

Meanwhile, Padmé had still not moved. Her hands, now shaking, remained clasped in her lap while she refused to meet his stare.

He silently stepped away from the bed and came to kneel down before his wife. "We will never see eye to eye," Vader whispered, taking her hands in his. "I do not need an ally- I need a wife."

"I need a husband and my children need a father."

"I am your husband."

"No," she said softly, "you are Vader. My husband is dead. You stopped being Anakin when you tried to kill my baby and I on Mustafar." 

Standing up and obviously agitated, Vader led her over to the bed and carefully laid Padmé down on the bed before tenderly placing the blankets over her trembling body. Satisfied, he slipped in between the covers and, wrapping his arms about her, fell asleep. 

Padmé envied his ability to sleep while she remained haunted by demons.

There would be no peace for her so long as he lived.  
Returning back from this haunting memory, Padmé found that her face was covered in tears and that her chest and the neckline of her nightgown were soaked. Only with great difficulty, Padmé stood up and looked at her pale reflection in the mirror.

Pathetic.

Quickly, she dried her tears with a towel and thanked the Force that Vader would not awaken for quite some time.

As she turned to leave, Padmé caught sight of her slender figure in the mirror. With a quaking hand, she gently rested her fingers against the smooth surface of her belly. In there grew an innocent and beautiful child, one that would be tainted by the stain of his or her father.

His child.

The thought of that alone sent her into tears and Padmé stood there clutching her stomach, praying that some mercy be shown to the little family that Padmé had so desperately tried to give her husband. Still, she knew deep down that this pregnancy was to be bleaker than the first two.

His fool heartedness might cost them another child, another life that would be sent to the grave before taking a first breath of life.

Stumbling through the darkness and not caring how much sound she made in doing so, Padmé collapsed on the bed and consequently bumped against Vader. She gasped and inched towards the other side of the bed lest he should waken in a bad mood and take it out on her.

Through the darkness, his blue eyes curiously peered at her. "How is my little wife feeling this morning?"   
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

**Spoiler for the next chapter: What Vader Did Not Know**

_"I had to stop by for a moment- I needed to see you," he murmured, his eyes closed as he pressed feathery kisses against her knuckles. "How is my lovely wife doing this morning?" _

"Beautifully," she replied, her hands sliding down to rest on top of her stomach. "Absolutely beautifully… Anakin, my love, there is something that I need to tell you…"


	15. The Baby

**Chapter 15: The Baby**

Though she jumped inwardly, Padmé did her best to keep her face straight lest Vader should see it through the small light.

"I've been better," Padmé whispered as he attempted to snuggle back against him before the Sith before he began to ask questions. A tear rolled down her face as she rested against the warm skin of his chest.

Without him even moving, the nearby lamp flickered on.

"You're crying," he noted, sliding away from the woman. Vader's cool eyes scrutinized her, slowly looking from her closed eyes to where Padmé held her unsettled stomach. "You know, there are millions of women out there who would love…"

"It's not that," she said through clenched teeth, angrily glaring at him.

The smirk on Vader's face unsettled her.

"You would not understand," she whispered, Padmé's heart crestfallenly knowing this to be true.

_Try me _his face seemed to gloat at her.

A sob escaped Padmé and she quickly rolled over so that he wouldn't see.

No comforting arms wrapped about her nor did a sympathetic hand reach out to touch her. Vader was probably still smirking at her, triumphant in his dominion over his crushed wife.

But Padmé knew things that he did not. Because of that, she was able to force a shaky smile. 

She'd been husbandless before, yet Padmé had survived.

Flashback, Six Years Before

Loneliness was her friend albeit a cruel one.

It had been three weeks before Padmé had seen Anakin and she was counting. Five hundred and four hours. Twenty-one days. 30,240 minutes. How many seconds, Padmé knew not, but she preferred the small number of three weeks- it somehow made his absence seem shorter.

Yet, as a newlywed, those varying numbers, which all accumulated to an eternity, meant and felt like a lifetime.

In the past five months that she'd been married to Anakin, Padmé had seen him less than a dozen times- ten, actually, she reminded herself while lying alone in bed. There should have been more times, but Padmé didn't want to think about those.

Padmé had something better, much more beautiful to think about.

The baby.

Anakin and her's baby.

Sitting up in bed, Padmé gently ran a hand over her stomach. No tests had been taken nor any trips to the Healer been made, but she knew that she was carrying his child.

Perhaps it was her motherly intuition, she thought with a wry smile that would have delighted Anakin.

Many women she'd known had tried and tried to conceive a child, yet she, Padmé Skywalker, had been blest.

Yes, the child was a blessing though none other than she and Anakin would see it as one.

A sudden hope flickered in Padmé and, closing her eyes, she tried to reach into the Force like Anakin had shown her how to.

_I love you, my Knight_

"Would you care to tell me more or am I supposed to guess what it was about?" Vader asked dryly.

Padmé began to tremble and, sitting up, worriedly took his cold hands in hers. "Vader, I am pregnant." 

"Anakin, I'm pregnant."

Silence.

Incredulity spread over his face. "That's w…wonderful," he sputtered, Anakin's eyes clouded over with some emotion she could not read. 

"Anakin, what are we going to do?"

He said nothing but continued to blankly watch her.

"Are you not happy?" Padmé whispered, her voice breaking as she did so. A sudden tear rolled down her cheek, but he did not move to brush it away like he would have years before. "You wanted a child…" 

"I wanted an heir," he interrupted brusquely.

She closed her eyes as Vader's cruel comment caused more tears to course out of her eyes. "Vader, I am very worried that something is about to happen to the baby and I."

"The Emperor doesn't know that you are with child or that I brought Leia here," Vader said in a thoroughly annoyed way, giving her a dark look. Still, he did not pull his hands away though Vader did not urge her to continue the discussion.

"In my… dream," Padmé started, pausing as her eyes filled up with tears to brush them away. Taking a deep breath, she found the strength to continue. "I was screaming and in terrible pain." At this, Padmé clenched her eyes shut as if that alone would ward off the unpleasant memories. "There was… blood everywhere." A sob caught in her throat. "The baby died… inside me," she cried her shaking hands pressing his against her womb. "The baby died," Padmé whispered again when Vader did not even blink. "You were not there with me… I don't even know where you were, honestly."

"It was just a dream," Anakin snapped, interrupting her flow of thoughts. 

Gasping, Padmé was too shocked for words. Numbly, she watched as Vader pulled his hands away from her stomach and settled back under the covers, his broad back to her.

"Vader, how can you say that?" she asked painfully, shaking her head in a disbelieving way.

In a move so sudden that it made Padmé jump, Vader rolled over and gave her a harsh look. "Three years ago, I had dreams that said you were going to die in childbirth, but you offered no comfort. I killed for you, Padmé, but you have yet to thank me."

"Thank you?" Padmé echoed, horror filling her ears at these words. "Anakin, what you did was murder- how can I be pleased that you killed younglings in my name?" 

"Don't expect any sympathy from me," he snarled. "That is the last thing I shall be giving you!" Then, he became silent. 

"So," she said slowly and purposefully, "you do not care whether something bad happens to the baby or I?"

"Oh, yes," Vader said hastily, "I do care- for my own selfish reasons. You and our children belong to _me_."

"That is slavery," Padmé whispered. "Vader, have you learned nothing from your past."

"It appears that you haven't learned from yours, either."

Softly crying, Padmé just sat there. "You are right," she finally admitted with a loud sob though her voice was oddly determined.

Rolling back over, Vader nevertheless stiffened.

"I should have learned my lesson a long time ago but I was too stubborn to stop believing in you," she cried out passionately, "and you will have to kill me for me to stop trying, but even then, I will haunt your every step for the rest of your miserable life." That said, Padmé burst into more tears.

Vader said nothing.

At this, a sea of hurt welled up in Padmé as she began to shake in fury. Three years of her life, three years that should have been spent contentedly raising her family, had been stolen from this monster. Vader neither cared nor wanted to help save what little family they had left. This angered her as she looked down at him with such a fierce loathing that only an abused wife and mother is capable of. 

"You stole one innocent child from me, Vader," she cried out her horrible secret that had been haunting her for years finally revealed. "Was that enough or must you rob yet another innocent life from my womb?"

Then, with all the strength and anger she'd kept hidden for three, long years, Padmé lunged out and hit Vader's exposed side as hard as she could. 

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**Spoiler for the next chapter: How does Vader react?  
**


	16. Patience is a Virtue

**Chapter 16: Patience is a Virtue**

After the initial impact, Vader just laid there, completely confused. This was all for a very good reason- Padmé had not once lifted so much as a finger against him.

His silence was alright for her- Padmé had all the time in the world. Literally. When it would come time for Vader to find out her secret, she would have unprecedented control over him.

But, moments later, the young woman found that this might not be so. With a snarl that send shivers down her spine, Vader flung her onto her back and pinned her against the bed, his furious face mere inches from hers.

"What are you going to do to me?" she choked out, only too aware of the pressure he was placing on her womb. "Kill me? Do so, and you will lose not only me but your heir. Who will raise Leia for you? What about Luke- when you and your pathetic search team find him, that is," Padmé spat. 

Blue eyes penetrated through her into her mind and heart. Shuddering, she looked away but still felt Vader's heated gaze on her.

And, as suddenly as his temper flared, the Sith moved off of her. Only then did she dare to open her eyes and let out the breath Padmé had unknowingly been holding. "How can I carry this child for nine months when you've already tried to harm it in the mere hours it's existed?"

As usual, Vader silently regarded her with pursed lips.

"And how are we to make our life together work if you'll never speak to me?"

"Oh, I'll speak to you," he spat, Vader's eyes mocking her as he slowly rubbed her stomach albeit not gently. "That 'pathetic' team you just spoke of has traced your son to the Lars' homestead on Tatooine." His sadistic grin widened as he saw her fear and realization of whom their child had been raised by. "Unfortunately, "he paused with a slight smirk, "I have more important things to tend to."

"They say… family should take first priority and then your job…"

"As of now, you do not figure into my list of priorities."

Though she knew that this harsh reality had been coming, Padmé was hurt in ways that could not be described. "That is… to bad," she said slowly, painfully choking on he words, "for you and our little family certainly rank high on mine."

"Once again, my love, we differ."

"We weren't always that way."

"So, I suppose your comment just a few minutes ago was supposed to make me ask 'What do you mean'?" he replied blandly.

A sly but not necessarily friendly smile spread across Padmé's lips. "Three years- three years I waited in agony to find out whether our little ones lived or perished in my womb before taking breath. For this, I consider it to be sufficient revenge for you to have to be patient, Lord Vader." 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 


	17. Skeletons in the Closet

**Chapter 17: Skeletons in the Closet**

Vader left before the next morning. He had not mentioned his eminent departure to her, so Padmé had awoken to an empty bet and no customary not of apology rested on the pillow next to her. To where or for how long the Sith had left, she knew not, but Padmé became unsure of whether she missed him or felt relief in his absence.

Without Vader's being around, she was able to love and nurture her little girl. Mother and daughter were in constant company with each other, and the only other person they ever saw was Jixton.

Occasionally and under the order of his employer, the large man would stop by to see how they were faring. For the first few times, Jixton lived in almost trepidation of the little girl but was soon giving Leia rides on his back, much to the alarm of her cautious mother.

As the months passed by, the child within Padmé steadily grew. Her once gaunt stomach became swollen and, sometimes in the dead of the night as she laid alone in bed, Padmé could have sworn she felt Anakin's strong arms cradling and caressing her belly.

But the only hands that ever loved her child were her own.

For all she knew, Vader was spending his time away in the company of another woman's bed.

Padmé did not want to think about that.

The nightmares began when she was four months along. Sometimes, things in the past needed to be forgotten. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 

_After waking up from such pleasant dreams, it was always a great disappointment for Padmé to find that her bed was still empty. For four long months, Anakin had been off fighting. The days had been unbearably long, and she wondered how much longer she could stand it._

Her lips curved as the baby kicked her stomach in reassurance.

It's alright, my little one Padmé told her baby. But the baby did not cease its kicking despite her kind thoughts. Still, Padmé got out of bed and prepared for the meetings that were to take place later on that morning.

Minutes later, her handmaidens entered into the bedroom and helped Padmé into her clothes. Nothing about her pregnancy had been told to them, yet many a suspicious glance was cast at her swollen middle.

Upon seeing this and the way they refused to look at her, Padmé blushed before hastily gathering her datacards and heading towards the door.

Someone was there, impeding her departure. 

"Master Kenobi!" she exclaimed in surprise, delightedly rushing towards her dear friend. Momentarily, Padmé thought she saw him glance at her stomach, but immediately dismissed it as paranoia.

Something was obviously wrong. His haggard face had lines of fatigue on it and his eyes contained overwhelming sorrow. 

Obi-Wan hadn't said anything, but Padmé already knew and so did the child she carried.

A minute later, Padmé found herself sitting on the couch, her friend's comforting hand holding her trembling one. Within her, the baby continued to stir uneasily at the loss of the parent he or she would never know.

"I am so sorry, Padmé," Obi-Wan said quietly. "I knew that Anakin had been a close friend of yours and that you would have wanted to hear of it from me."

Not until you've lost a loved one can you fully understand the emptiness and loneliness that follows. Those dreadful minutes slowly passed by as Padmé realized how greatly her life had changed- before Anakin had stepped into her life, she had not felt the empty hole that existed, but now that he was gone, she saw how grim the rest of her life was to be. 

"My lady?" he finally asked after the senator had sat in silence for quite some time.

"Thank you, Master Kenobi," the young woman whispered, turning her large, haunted eyes on him. "If you'll excuse me, I have a meeting to attend."

Her life as she had known it might have ended, but the Galaxy continued on.

And so would she.   
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Jumping up in the darkness, Padmé's heart pounded. 

He was back.

A million thoughts and comments filled her head, including "So, you decided to come back?" but she instead found herself saying, "Hello," in a soft voice that he probably couldn't hear.

"Hello," he rumble back and, at that precise moment, flickered on the light.

Though he had been away for a good several months, Vader did not have the appearance of a man who had filled his leisure time with women and other pleasures. Hard lines creased his face and weary blue eyes stared back at his wife. His muscular and still fully-clothed body leaned against the bedpost in fatigue.

"Where were you?" she whispered, not daring to move.

"You are going to regret your pointed jealousy-filled comments when I tell you," he replied dryly. The weariness left his eyes only to be replaced with mockery. 

"As your wife, I have the right to know-"

"I know what you are thinking, my dear wife," he interrupted with great irritation, "but I can assure you that I wasn't in any of those places." His piercing eyes slowly looked her over and finally rested on her stomach. "Sit up," Vader commanded.

Padmé froze and clutched the concealing blankets to her chin, but fear of his wrath caused her to slowly and shakily sit up. Still, the blankets pooled in her lap, covering what her husband wished to see. 

In a highly exaggerated movement, Vader moved towards her and, not once breaking his hold on Padmé's petrified eyes, pulled away the blankets.

Any other father would have been filled with pride at the beautiful sight, but Vader just regarded her with his sneering eyes.

She knew what was coming next, but when a gloved hand pressed hard against her stomach, Padmé could not help but gasp. This uncomfortable moment paused momentarily as Vader looked up briefly, but he soon continued his ministrations. 

Being not very far along, he was able to cradle her small belly within his strong hands. Within Padmé, the baby kicked and stirred as it felt the unfamiliar presence of his or her father. Despite herself, Padmé closed her eyes and enjoyed his caresses.

Gentle lips touched her own. He was gentle, and that alone was enough to make Padmé open her eyes in surprise, but she immediately closed them and sank into his embrace.

Having undone the fastenings on the bottom of her nightshirt, Vader touched her warm stomach, making the baby quiver in excitement.

Minutes later, she sat close to him with her head resting on Vader's shoulder. Padmé knew that Vader cared about her for only selfish motives, but the last few minutes had felt so much like… it was supposed to have. It reminded her so much of Anakin that she could not but wish that the heart that beat under her cheek was his. 

"You are carrying a daughter," he whispered, shifting about uneasily.

A daughter.

"That is… wonderful," she stammered, feeling the tears that welled up in her eyes. "Wonderful…"

"Are you not pleased?" Vader hissed, pulling away from her suddenly. His face had lost it's tender quality as he glared down at his wife with pursed lips.

"No," she said, shaking her head. Still, the woman knew that he saw the tears that slipped down her face. "I am very happy…"

"But?" 

"You could never understand."

That was as far as Vader's interest in the mater went. "Very well. There is someone here who I wish for you to meet." 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

_Padmé had wanted to run back to her bed and lie there weeping for the rest of the day and the next month, perhaps. Anakin was dead, and she'd lost her purpose for living._

The baby kicked, forcing the Senator back into reality. Rubbing her stomach dully when the fact of feeling her baby kick had brought joy just hours earlier, Padmé looked out of the window of the speeder that was taking her to Bail Organa's penthouse. It was futile, this wishing for respite- all of these tears would not change what had happened.

To her great surprise, it was Bail himself who greeted Padmé at the speeder as it landed. Grim faced, he told her of Anakin's unfortunate and sudden demise.

"Master Kenobi has informed me of it," she said stiffly, refusing to look at her friend but instead strode inside and towards the conference room. At that moment, the baby kicked again.

You still have my love, little one

The meeting soon centered not upon the original discussion but around the Chosen One's death. Half of those gathered demanded instant retaliation while others sought other and more peaceful responses.

"The matter of the fact is," Bail insisted, "that we cannot…"

For the first half of the meeting, Padmé had just sat there stiffly clutching her glass but the constant moving of the baby left her uneasy. Normally rather quiet in its existent, the baby did not pause in its kicking for even a moment.

It's alright… everything will be alright

Soon, the glass rested on the table as Padmé indiscreetly placed a hand on her womb. Though she was now feverishly cold, a thin layer of sweat covered the woman's forehead as her pulse began to race.

Something was very wrong.

A burning sensation erupted in Padmé's stomach.

"Something's wrong with my baby!"   
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

**Coming Next: Where's my baby?**


	18. Mother To A Dead Baby

**Chapter 18: Mother To A Dead Baby**

Vader had said nothing else about their new arrival, but Padmé's motherly instinct assured her hear that her deepest wish had come true- finally, their little family would be reunited.

A stab of guilt stung Padmé and she shifted her eyes away from the dark being who broodingly strode ahead of her.

_There will be some things that time and understanding can never heal_

Suddenly, out of nowhere flew a woman with long blond hair. In her hands was a blaster which she did not hesitate in using on the Sith Lord. The sound of it being shot filled the empty corridors, mixing with Padmé's screams.

Wounded by the unmerciful onslaught, Vader's lifeless body crumpled to the ground only to be kicked aside by the ruthless woman.

"Who are you?" Padmé wept, both grateful yet afraid of this wild woman who dared to take on the most dreaded Sith.

"I am StarAngel, and I have come to rescue you!"

**Wait a minute… wrong story!**

**Chapter 18: Mother To A Dead Baby**

Vader had said nothing else about their new arrival, but Padmé's motherly instinct assured her hear that her deepest wish had come true- finally, their little family would be reunited.

A stab of guilt stung Padmé and she shifted her eyes away from the dark being who broodingly strode ahead of her.

_There will be some things that time and understanding can never heal _

Swiftly, he led her to his own chambers and punched in the code so that they could enter. 

"Wait!" she suddenly cried out, placing her hand upon his gloved one as Vader moved to press the last button.

This movement startled the Sith, and he looked down at her with piercing blue eyes.

"I know that you are not doing this for me," Padmé said breathlessly as her dark eyes filled with tears, "but thank you… it… means the world to me."

Once more, confusion seemed to stun Vader, but with a muttering under his breath, he shifted uneasily and pulled away his arm rather brusquely. As if to prove that he was still the bad tempered Sith Lord she'd come to know, he jammed in the last part of the code and all but pushed Padmé into the door as it opened.

Standing there in the center of the room in all childish innocence was a sandy-haired boy of about three years.

"Luke," she breathed. Years of aching to hold her baby flooded her and, with a great sob, Padmé rushed forward and pulled the child into her loving arms.

In a confused silence, Luke stared at the black being that stood behind the woman , completely ignoring the angel that wept into his hair.

"Oh, my baby!" Padmé whispered.

For the first time in three years, Padmé was complete.

Almost. 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
**Flashback**

_Something was missing. Though only half conscious and feeling like she'd been ran over by an overweight bantha, Padmé knew that something very precious had been ruthlessly snatched away from her, leaving an emptiness that could never be filled._

"My daughter?" she whispered drowsily, her head lolling to the other side as she sleepily blinked at the healer standing before her.

"My Lady, you need rest," the large man insisted firmly though he refused to look at he.

"Where's my baby?"

The healer bit his lip. "My lady…"

Padmé became delirious and struggled to sit up, and the moment her feet touched the ground, she nearly collapsed. She had to find her baby.

"Please, you shouldn't be up!"

But she was not noticing.

Shaking hands fled to her almost flat stomach.

It hadn't been that way earlier before passing out.

"My baby!" she cried out, running her hands along the flatness only to not feel the curve that had been there, Thinking that her hands were tricking her, Padmé looked down only to see the blood that was spattered on her legs. In response, her weary and pained limbs gave out and, with a wail of agony, the Senator fell to the floor.

This alerted the attention of the healers passing by her room, and they helped the other healer place the young woman back on the bed,

"It was a girl," she sobbed through the dears that rained down her face. "It was a girl… Anakin's daughter." As of saying the horrible truth that her heart could not accept, Padmé felt the weight of deadness settle within her.

Perhaps it was because they did not understand what she had said or remained silent out of respect for the mournful time, but the healers did not blink at this most unusual revelation.

"Lie back down," the main healer urged when Padmé tried to stir again.

"I want to see my baby…" she whispered, sounding like a little, lost child. "Please… I need to hold her… she was so little."

Grief washed over the healer's face and he slowly nodded before gesturing for the others to leave the room. He too did so, but returned a minute later.

In his arms was a tiny but precious pink bundle.   
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Despite the sudden domestic bliss that befell the troubled young woman, there still remained a tiny problem- Leia. The little girl was still sleeping and completely unaware that her life had been invaded by the presence of the little brother she'd never met. On the way back to her quarters, Padmé whispered of this debacle to Vader, but he merely shrugged.

Inside the room, she sat down with a visibly anxious Luke who stood before her looking thoroughly confused as to where he was or with whom he was with. Only when Vader had went into the other room to get Leia did she dare to say anything. "Oh, my little one!" Padmé whispered, her eyes welling up with tears as she cupped Luke's angelic face with her hand. "Do you not know who I am?"

After a quizzical look spread across his chubby face, Luke shook his head and looked at her with frightened eyes. For an added sense of security, the little boy popped one of his thumbs into his mouth.

This honest confession nearly broke Padmé's heart, and it was all she could do to hold her smile and not burst into her tears. "That's okay," she said quietly. "I'm your mommy."

Neither recognition nor anything else dawned in Luke's eyes. It had taken Leia only a few moments to understand this revelation, but this child didn't seem to even understand the concept of what a 'mommy' really was.

Before anything else could happen, Vader strode back into the main room with a still-sleeping Leia in his arms. Her little face was buried into his hard chest and her arms were hugging his neck as she tried to go back to peaceful slumber.

Despite her protestations, Leia was soon standing before the even more than before bewildered Luke. The two children stared at each other as recognition slowly dawned in their minds.

But, jealousy soon took control of little Leia, causing her to climb onto Padmé's lap and glower down at Luke whose gaze she did not break. "Take him back," she whispered loudly into her mother's ear.

This comment startled the older woman, but she managed to calmly reply, "But he's your brother! You've always aid you wanted a brother or sister."

A significant look from the three year old at Padmé's belly clearly said that Leia only wanted someone littler than her. "Take him back." The last look she sent Luke nearly dared the little boy to take her place.

Thoroughly distressed, the woman looked up to find that Vader was chuckling. "Is there anything more you could want, My Lady?" 

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_Fear gripped Padmé and curled about her in it's lifeless embrace. Part of her wanted to scream and cover her ears, telling the medic to take the bundle away and not show her so as to spare her yet another heartbreak. Perhaps, if she didn't see her child or held the baby in her arms, Padmé could pretend it never existed._

She had always been a poor liar.

Thus, with tears rolling down her face, the Senator watched with great trepidation as the Healer stepped towards her, not wanting to feel the moment in which what she had tried to deny would become reality for her.

"Here," the man said simply, holding out the child for her to take.

With shaking hands, Padmé did so and accidentally let out a gasp of shock at the contact.

The baby was little- oh so tiny. Snuggled deep within the pink blanket Padmé had so lovingly mad her, slept a light haired, blue eyed angel who rested in eternal peace.

Her mother realized that she didn't even have a name for her dead baby.

As she cradled the baby close to her breast and gently reached out to touch the soft flesh of her fist, Padmé began to weep even more, the tears rolling from her eyes onto the baby's still-fragile and warm skin.

Though not fully grown, the baby was undoubtedly Anakin's child. Her little mouth was open, much like Anakin had the habit of when sleeping, his warm breath warming her skin. Tiny hands with long fingers that had been inherited by her father were clenched tightly, making Padmé wonder if the baby had suffered any pain.

Padmé was a mother to a dead baby. Never would Anakin be able to see the child he fathered, and while other mothers would leave the Healers with a baby, she would be left with a box containing a few mementoes and a small coffin.   
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_  
Until the doctor took her baby away, Padmé sat there rocking the infant in her arms and whispering of the love she would never be able to show._

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**Here's some tissues and chocolate for you all!**


	19. Padmé’s Demise

**Chapter 19: Padmé's Demise **

Leaving behind those you love is never an easy decision. The knowledge of the memories that shall never be forever haunt the victim, a wraith in unpleasant dreams and during the waking hours.

The decision to do so did not suddenly occur to Padmé but rather had been in the back of her mind for quite some time. Horrifying though it was, this thought took reality one sleepless night as she laid next to a softly snoring Vader.

Life with him had not been bliss- the quite opposite of that, actually- but the woman knew that her life as she knew it was to soon come to an end.

Turning her head to look at the unsuspecting Sith, Padmé knew only too well how vulnerable he was. How or when it was to be accomplished, she knew not, but it had to be done and SOON.

But, how could she also safely escape with the twins? A hissing voice in the back of her mind told Padmé that she already knew the answer to this- a few things much more precious and dearer than her own self would have to be left behind, though they would certainly never be forgotten.

A lump settled in her throat as Leia snuggled closer to her mother, her tiny head resting in the crook of Padmé's arm. The little girl, along with Luke, had insisted upon sharing Vader's time with his wife, something which had displeased the Sith Lord greatly, though he had otherwise remained silent about it.

That night, Padmé did not sleep but unblinkingly stared into the darkness as her life quickly fell into shambles around herself. 

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Like always, Vader had awoken before Padmé but chose to remain lying in the crowded bed.

"Good morning," she said upon blinking her eyes open to find him staring at her after Padmé had sufficiently feigned being asleep.

Vader was not fooled by this. "You did not sleep."

At this, the young woman averted her eyes and, after gently moving Leia off of her, rested her head on Vader's chest.

This act momentarily silenced him, but Vader soon broke the peaceful silence. "What troubles you?"

She had a vague feeling that he already knew the answer to this. "The same thing that has been on my mind since I came to you on Mustafar."

Silence reigned as both bitterly thought of that terrible day, husband and wife remembering from two very differing perspectives.

"My intent was not to kill you or the child," he said matter-of-factually though his tone carried a lack of caring, "contrary to the lies Obi-Wan spoon-fed you."

"That is what he said. Obi-Wan helped me, Vader, and without him, I would have died with the twins still within me." Padmé's voice trembled at the end of this, and the woman hastily buried her face into his chest so that her voluminous curls covered the tears that fell.

"I… I had always wondered," Vader trailed off. "And I am I right in guessing that Bail Organa was also involved?"

Sniffling, Padmé nodded slowly and, much to her surprise, he held her close.

"Anakin- Vader- will you be there for me this time?" Padmé whispered so quietly that she feared the Sith hadn't heard her.

"I have no control over that," he admitted with great reluctance. "If my Master commands that I go on a mission, I must obey- you have to understand this."

"No… No, I don't."

He let out a haggard sigh. "Jixton will be around-"

"That would not be the same," she snapped. Having realized her harshness and the danger of doing so, Padmé hastily softened her voice. "I want YOU to be there."

But, Padmé then realized that his being there or not would not make a difference- hopefully, she would be long gone.

"Enough," Vader said so harshly that she actually jumped. "Save this tedious conversation for another day." Grumbling to himself of something which contained the words 'hormonal pregnant women,' he stumbled out of the bed. 

She sat up and nervously fidgeted before blurting out, "You lied to me."

Obviously thinking that his wife was referring to one of their many past arguments, Vader sighed and slumped his shoulders before turning around to face her. "Continue on- I know you will regardless of whether I want you to or not."

This response surprised Padmé, and she was speechless for a good minute. "You promised me that you would overthrow the Chancellor- and that you could, mind you- and we would rule the Galaxy together." 

Narrowing his eyes suspiciously, Vader pursed his lips. 

"Over three years later, the Emperor is still alive and you are just as much his slave as ever."

What Padmé had expected his reaction to be, she had not considered, but the troubled woman had not expected for him to throw a small but neatly wrapped package into her lap. "Happy anniversary to you too," he muttered. Having finished changing, Vader fastened his cloak before storming out of the room.

For the first time that she could remember, he did not lock her in. 

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For at least a minute, Padmé just sat there holding the small package. Without opening it, she already knew what it contained and the commitment it required of her.

Was she ready?

_Oh, Anakin, what has happened to us?_ the woman thought sadly as she looked down at her protruding belly. 

Though Anakin had been a noble warrior, it had never escaped her that she was a poor man's wife, but Padmé never cared. While other wives enjoyed being lavished upon by their husbands, her happiest moments had been in his arms. Anakin had silently understood this acceptance but had always longed to give her the fine things he thought she deserved.

A small smile spread across Padmé's face as she observed her steadily growing family. _Anakin, you did give me the most precious gifts. If you truly cared about me, you surely would have realized this _

Flinging the package down on the bed unopened, she rushed over to her closet and quickly changed into a traveling outfit with a matching cloak.

_Force be with me- I do not know how I am to do this _

"And where are you going?" a bemused voice asked.

So frightened was she that Padmé actually jumped.

"You know that you're not allowed out of these quarters," Jixton teased, waggling an oversized finger at her as she smiled weakly.

"I was just…"

Jixton raised a mocking eyebrow at her.

"I… I…" Padmé continued to stammer all the while she searched for a plausible excuse. "Okay, fine- if you really must know." Taking a shaky breath, she lied. "Today is my three year wedding anniversary."

"I would say congratulations if that were anything for me to be happy about."

Caught off guard once more, Padmé forgot what she had originally been saying. "He gave me a lovely gift but… I wanted to deliver his in person." 

He laughed. "Seeing how Uncle D hasn't left the ship, he should return soon enough for you."

At this, she became irritated. "No!" came the angry cry. Then, she saw his reaction and quickly lowered her voice. "I mean," Padmé said more politely and with a friendly smile, "he is mad at me right now and this would surprise him and…"

"I would certainly say it would," Jixton grinned, obviously thinking that she was not intending to give Vader any material gift…

"Please?" she begged. "I have not and will never ask you for any other favors…"

The man shrugged nonchalantly.

"Thank you!" Bending over her children, Padmé placed a kiss on each of their foreheads.

"Wait a minute," Jixton said suspiciously, casting the twins an uneasy look. "Who's going to look after them while you go off and 'fraternize' with Uncle D?" 

Flashing him what she hoped was a winning smile, Padmé rushed out the door and on the way to freedom. 

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Five minutes later, the frazzled woman was kicking herself for having been brought onboard unconscious and consequently having no idea as to where she was headed. All of the metal hallways and rooms were identical and, had she not noticed the subtle differences, Padmé would have sworn that she was merely walking in circles. 

For a moment, she wished that Anakin was there with her- but she then realized that he would probably take the most dangerous route possible.

Distant clattering of metallic boots sent her scurrying to an alcove until the danger had passed. Only when her heart had settled down did Padmé dare to breathe.

Finally, there it was- the turbolifts that would take the young woman to the hangar bay- or, at lest, the map on the wall indicated. With a big sigh of relief, she jammed the red button and patiently waited while casting wary glances over her shoulders.

The coast was clear. In the next moment, Padmé whirled around as the turbolift's door slid open.

And stopped dead in her tracks. 

"Considering the fact that I have you under lock and key and have assigned you a bodyguard, how ever did you manage to escape?" Vader sneered.

The man in the turbolift next to Vader slowly backed away with very wide and frightened eyes.

"I think it is time that you learn your lesson once and for all." With a sudden move of his fingers, Padmé's unmoving body fell to his feet. "Goodbye, dear wife," he sneered, kneeling down. With his gloved hand, Vader took one of her brown curls between his finger and thumb and kissed it. "You were too foolish to understand." 

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Without appointment, Vader boldly strode into the Emperor's throne room.

Sidious cackled at the sight of Padmé's limp body in the Sith's arms, but he still regarded the scene with some suspicion "Do not hesitate to show same vengeance on the other members of your pathetic family."

"As you wish, my Lord." 

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End file.
